TheRealBennyLava

TheRealBennyLava blog will be moving to a new home to be announced soon. I figure no one knows what I’m talking about when I refer to The Real Benny Lava and I hate people posting links to my blog and saying that “Benny wrote this” or “Benny is a bumbling idiot”. I, Andrew am the bumbling idiot behind this and hope to get full credit soon in the new blog….I’ll port the stuff from here over to the new one too…and I promise it will look better.

I am the first winner in the TC50 contest for a free ticket. I can’t believe it. When I got home from the beach turned on my phone and checked my Twinkle (great app Mike Lee…everyone should join his charity group, Club Thievey (I’m a member) at http://www.thievey.org)) and I saw I had won. I jumped up off the couch and screamed. I was literally speechless, well not literally I was more surprised than anything else. I’m still in absolute shock and am trying to find the cheapest hotel and airfare, I don’t think the airfare is going to screw me as much as the hotel will. If anyone wants to donate a hotel room let me know I’ll pimp your stuff.  Anyway I am prepared to deliver on as many of the promises i have made in my post as I can. I am going to be ordering a shirt (submit a design if you want) that says I’m a winner of this contest and thanks to Jcal and stuff. I apologize for my utter crap quality of writing—I’m just sooooo stoked!

Thanks Jason Calacanis and the TechCrunch team, I can’t wait to get up to San Fran and enjoy the awesomeness that is sure to be TC50.

Also want to give a shout out to the other winner.

http://blog.zemote.com/archives/2008/08/15/10-reasons-why-jason-calacanis-should-give-me-a-free-ticket-to-techcrunch50/

Okay I’ve since edited this post after I first posted it, i have added some stuff, hopefully it is a little funnier now and I’ve also included my picture and some other images.

For those of you haven’t heard about TechCrunch50 it is an awesome event where 51 startups( present their idea in front of a huge group of people including awesome judges like Tim O’Reilly and Robert Scoble. The event is put on by TechCrunch in association with its sponsors and is organized by Mike Arrington (editor of TechCrunch) and Jason Calacanis (overall cool guy and CEO/Founder of Mahalo). The organizers are holding a contest to give out a free ticket to the event to whomever makes the best blog post stating 10 reasons they should go and that is why I am posting about it, because I am listing my top 50 reasons, since I want to show that I want to go five times as much as everyone else. I will count backwards.’

EDIT: Reason 51: I wont’ pull a Dave Winer and demand an API right away.

Reason 50: It is TechCrunch Friggin 50! The coolest event of the whole fragging year.

Reason 49: I won’t wear sunglasses inside which means I won’t look like I am from the CIA, FBI, Secret Service, KGB or MI6.

Reason 48: The world needs me to be there…otherwise there will be a rift in the time space continiumabobble

Reason 47: I will save you money by not drinking alcohol at any open bar events, which makes giving me a free ticket the better financial option for the organizing team.

Reason 46: I’ll keep my phone on Vibrate so it doesn’t interrupt everything, that way I can still blog from it and receive text messages, and provide Twitter updates via Twinkle.

Reason 45: If I was to get the invite I would invite the organizing group ,or any of them that choose to attend to come to my house and my mom will make you a nice homemade dinner.

Reason 44: Only 43 more reasons to read.

Reason 43: I am fluent in English, which I guess is the language everyone will be presenting in. If it is not then I am not sure i want to go, I’m American, I don’t really know any other language :).

Reason 42: I will be an exemplary attendee and you will be glad you gave me a pass to the conference.

Reason 41: I’ll bring my DVDs and let everyone watch them if you want.

Reason 40: This is TechCrunch 50 not TechCrunch 40, It is therefore going to be at least 20% better than last year.

Reason 39: Getting to see and possibly meet Tim O’Reilly would be awesome. He is a genius and has created what I consider to be the best publishing company in the world today. He changed the industry for sure.

Reason 38: I will blog live from the event. I’ll have both my iPhone and my MacBook Pro with me and I’ll be blogging live.

Reason 37: I don’t have a reason 37, its a prime number.

Reason 36: 6 is divisible into 36 6 times. I am more than 6 years old, therefore I should get the invite because I am also under 36. Did I just blow your mind? I think I did.

Reason 35: I have an iPhone and I expect that some of the companies will be companies with iPhone related ideas and products and that will be very interesting.

Reason 34: The only technology related conference I have attended (other than the Los Angeles County Science Fair) was the 2005 CES, and that was fun, but it wasn’t as educational as TechCrunch50 would be for obvious reasons.

Reason 33: I’ll clean your car if you give me a free ticket.

Reason 32: If invited i’ll help out in anyway that is asked of me.

Reason 31: I promise not to break in to Mike Arrington’s home to pitch my startup when we do launch.

Reason 30: Tech is in my blood, I have been obsessed with technology since I was 4 and got an early Macintosh and Reader Rabbit.

Reason 29: I currently use Mint, the winner of last year’s TechCrunch 40 event and absolutely love it. I only wish i had known about it sooner. By attending TechCrunch 50 I will be able to learn about new products as they are announced and be among the first group of first adopters.

Reason 28: In the event of an earthquake I can help others with procedure as I have dealt with many earthquakes living in Los Angeles for most of my life.

Reason 27: I am the Real Benny Lava and therefore I am insanely awesome.

Reason 26: I’ve spent over an hour coming up with these 50 things because I truly do want to go to TechCrunch, it is not just a vacation for me, it is a real exciting learning opportunity.

Reason 25: Demo Sucks, and I’ll help to spread that message beyond where it has already been spread. Demo is a bunch of liars and rip off artists and I think that

Reason 24: Hopefully Mahalo Daily is there and I get to meet Leah or Lon, or better yet both.

Reason 23: I am a card carrying member of the Jason Calacanis’s Jason Nation

Reason 22: I am an airplane and airline nerd and if anyone has problems booking tickets or needs help finding the best deal I can help find it for them

Reason 21: I looooooove free stuff.

Reason 20: I would love to see San Francisco, I have not had a chance to go to San Francisco since I was in my early teens and thing it would be an awesome experience.

Reason 19: I want to meet Loic Lemur and compare his real life image to his puppet image

Reason 18: I don’t think I can dance nor do I ‘wanna’ dance.

Reason 17: I want this thing 5 times more than anyone else.

Reason 16: I can bring insight I have from when I visited Africa

Reason 15: I’m not cool enough to have to go to all the parties so I’ll give my spots up to Taurus and Fondue

Reason 14: If I get in for free I will make a t-shirt saying I love JCal and wear it one of the days of the event.

Reason 13: I am not Jerome Corsi

Reason 12: I like good food and can always help finish off food if you have some unfinished food.

Reason 11: I love startups and I hate photoshop….I suck at it! I think this should be ample evidence of such as i couldn’t even figure out how to do this in Photoshop so I did it in Fireworks.

Reason 10: I love technology startups and read TechCrunch everyday…what was up with that Bigfoot story btw, it seemed a bit out of place.

Reason 9: I am trying to get my own startup going (much smaller scale than those that launch at TechCrunch) and this would be a valuable learning experience, plus when we finally launch we will be give due credit to TechCrunch for a free ticket to the TechCrunch50 event that helped me gain valuable knowledge.

Reason 8: I would be able to spread the knowledge gained and my insights to my friends, both in real life, on twitter, friendfeed and Facebook (I have tons of Facebook Friends).

Reason 7: I am young, just 20 years old, and would be able to bring a youthful vibe and perspective to the conference…and I look younger so I can make everyone feel older!

Reason 6: I’m big, about 6′3 235 (right now)  so if you happen to have a riot I can help try to stop it.

Reason 5: Jason Calacanis is someone I look up to and to be able to attend an event he has helped organize would be a dream come true and extremely awe inspiring.

Reason 4: I have very little money, but could use my savings to pay for a hotel room and the gas to drive up there if the ticket was free.

Reason 3: I LOVE conferences, when I was in college (I was there for a year) I loved going to conferences and went to as many as I could. Now that i have to work I can no longer afford to go to conferences that interest me.

Reason 2: I believe that TechCrunch50 is the best way for a quality startup to launch and I think that I can be a part of history with great companies launching, if I am to be given the honor of attending.

Reason 1: I know that TechCrunch50 is better than Demo, and kindly request that Demo stop lying and continue to suck just as much while losing out to TechCrunch50 which will hopefully become TechCrunch60 next year.

Please do consider my application, I hope that the humor included, albeit minimal has at least increased your day a bit.

-The Real Benny Lava aka Andrew Fielding

I’ve not posted in a while but I’m writing this from my iphone. I’ve noticed lots of apps that are updating. In fact the new York times updated to add categories and make advertisements smaller. The AP has made multiple updates restoring stability and adding localizations of news.
It seems like both major news outlets decided to originally release unfinished, unstable apps. Who is at fault for this? Is it apple or the news providers’ developers? I am not sure but I think the developers clearly could have done more quicker rather than spending the first few weeks just adding minor features and fixes. There are tons offeatures these apps should have and don’t, why with multiple updates being released why have we yet to see any major updates?

-Andrew

First off let me say this: Welcome to my Blog, now get the fuck out!

…and if you’re still with us feel free to read this post, regarding the amazing Mahalo VLog Idol/Bachelon/Mapprentice. For those of you that don’t know what this is, it is a contest to find the next host for the great video podcast known as Mahalo Daily. The search is for a new co-host to host along with Lon Harris and fill in for the now departed (to Tekzilla) Veronica Belmont.

The competition is currently down to the final two contestants, Andrea Rene and Leah D’Emilio. For the final challenge Jason Calacanis assigned each contestant to create a viral video in the spirit of Mahalo. Each contestant had 5 days to complete their video and the first video was released on Monday and featured Andrea Rene in a Guitar Hero Training Video spoof. Today, Tuesday, the release of Leah Demilio’s video, a “Touch My Body” by Mariah Carey music video parody emerged. The two videos have different approaches to the viral video objective and only Leahs seems to actually accomplish the goal. I’m going to breakdown each video into my favorite parts and least favorite parts. I’ll rate each video on three categories: Production Quality, Comedic Value and the ‘Viralness’ of the video.

Andrea Rene- Girl Trains for Guitar Hero

1. Production Quality: 3/5 It is obvious that a professional video crew was involved but there are some scenes where the lighting sucks and the angles and camera movement don’t seem to be that great. I am not expecting Movie quality shots, but more a television advertisement or professional internet comedy troupe type quality and this just wasn’t up to that level.
2. Comedic Value: 1/5 I did not find this very funny. I thought that the only funny things involved Lon and not Andrea and I believe that comedy is a big part of a podcast, especially a video podcast produced by a company such as Mahalo so I feel this a big hit against Andrea’s effort.
3. ‘Viralness’: 2/5 This video lacks the certain flair that makes someone want to watch it multiple times. I watched it once and didn’t have any urge to watch it again other than to check out specific things that other commenters on the video had pointed ou

Leah Demilio- Touch My Body Parody feat. Lon Harris and Leah D’Emilio

1. Production Quality: 4/5 I felt that this was lacking in some areas, though I do not feel lighting was one of them. The only real negative things I believe are the camera work during the pool scene and the use of the beginning of the video from the actual original, however this does make it seem a little more professional in some ways. I feel this is a very strong 4/5 very close to the production quality of a television commercial or the like.
2. Comedic Value: 4/5 I’ve seen funnier things online but there were just all these great little funny touches, and you realize even more of them as you watch it for the 3rd, 4th and 12th times. I love Lon’s strut and Leah as Princess Leia, and my favorite is Leah sounding like McLovin when she says “Whazzup”
3. ‘Viralness’: 4/5 I don’t think this is going to go crazy viral on the internet but if it was to get 500k hits that would not at all surprise me. It has the ability to draw the viewer in to watch it multiple times and just keep them wanting more. I’ve watched it about 15 times so far.

Result: 12-6 Leah wins.

Some people may argue that I’m biased towards Leah due to Andrea being portrayed as vindictive on the Mapprentice but I made my ratings being unbiased. I truly believe that Leah’s video is hands down better. After first seeing it I thought it was just a little better than Andrea’s but as it keeps making me want to watch it over and over again I realize that it is truly monkey tails and lions on trees, above the rest…and just as i’m ending writing this there is some maniac driver on Bristol, driving what sounds like 60-70 around a bunch of roundabouts and drifting…I wouldn’t even do that and I’m certifiably nuts

I’d love to hear what people have to say about my ratings and your thoughts on Mahalo Daily Vlog Idol, I am sad to see it end but am confident that based on the final round task, viral videos, my personal favorite throughout a lot of the competition, Leah D’Emilio will be the victor. Good luck to all involved and I can’t wait to see what else Mahalo Daily has in store.

-Andrew aka The Real Benny Lava